subjectzero

At my worst..best.

faces, personal
21 Sep 2009

Creatively, I’m certainly at my best when, emotionally, I’m at my worst.  Typically, I don’t create anything when I’m down..  I use the time to put the influx of ideas in my head to paper, but then, almost certainly never act them out.  It’s a vicious cycle that feeds itself on my creative energy, and devours all that could have been.  I’m assuming this is what makes me an artist as opposed to a photographer, though I often don’t feel like either.  While everything else seems to indicate my life is falling apart, I decided against going with my usual decision to just write shit down, and actually create.  Medicine for the evening, a photo-shoot with a friend..  I often wonder as to what level my mood effects what I capture.  How much of the model is seen in my photographs; how much of it is what I project onto them?  What, if either, is detected by the viewer?  How much does a beautiful appearance, or a good show, hide pain?